How To Make Faster?

1) Vista is the slowest most crappy os, how can I make it faster?

2) You could throw it out the window so it will fall and it would go faster

1) if I tied a rock it it before I throw it will it go faster?

2) idiot! the acceleration g is constant!!! no matter if its a feather or a canon ball! What differs is the distance it will travel as its accelerating, and its aerodynamics.

1) so if I put it in an aerodynamic enclosure it will go faster?

2) yes but thats not all you can do!

1) Ahh I see what you mean.. can I put it in a canon and shoot it?

2) canons are so 16th century! Now that the US economy is falling apart they are selling the shuttle rocket solid fuel boosters that you can tie on to vista and shoot into space!

1) But what if we steer it towards a planet? Wont the gravitational pull
make it faster?

2) That would do some good but if you really want to make if faster you
can steer it towards a star

1) A star is good.. but I would like to make it go faster.. vista is so
lame its still slow

2) then steer it towards a black hole its intense gravitational pull will accelerate it to close to the speed of light

1) But what will happen when it enters the black hole?

2) It will enter a parallel alternate universe where vista works well,doesnt have bugs, and free and works fast.